Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
