we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
