oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
