dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize