haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
