it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Randomize
