She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
