took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i think my mom watched the whole time
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
