And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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