How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
