butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
