Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Randomize
