So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
