ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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