If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
As shirtless as possible
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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