it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
