I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
