Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I wish I only lived at night.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize