There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
