he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
