apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
