positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
