if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
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