We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
