I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
