The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize