You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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