that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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