I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
