Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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