The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize