I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
