D3 body, D1 cock
My friends, they love my intelligence
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
