Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
wanna go halves on a baby?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
