At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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