why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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