I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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