But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
