Capitaan dildo arrescate!
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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