did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
