I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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