You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize