I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
