I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
