But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
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