Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
