I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
