I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
