after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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