oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
